I need some sleep, I am tired. This job is deceptive in many ways, it doesn’t feel like I’m working hard, but it is tiring me, I presume it’s because of there being so much to learn so quickly. It is considerably more enjoyable than being in the private sector so I shall make it my business to try to remain here.

The world tonight, well the US is letting some people go from Guantanamo, how magnanimous of them. From what I’ve heard it’s get them out now to avoid an embarrasing supreme court ruling around election time, which explains why the other 2 Britons won’t be let out. I still find it incredulous that the rules that apply to any other country do not apply to the US if any other country was holding people like this there’d be a furore in the UN and Amnesty would be firmly on the case. The double standards involved are just bollocks, I’m sick of it.

Well who knows, am I overestimating my own potential/importance by taking it all so personally. I guess it’s down to Mother convincing me as a child that I could acomplish anything and deep down some of that stuck. So whilst the logical side says ‘look you are not going to be the next Karl Marx or Noam Chomsky’ there’s still part of me that sits there saying ‘well why not’ someone has to help fill the void, why not me. I think it’ll only be proven one way or the other when the opportunity really presents itself to see whether I can actually hack it in that arena, this is perhaps why I still harbour the ambition to be an academic to hide behind that side to act as a barrier against rejection. I’m still not good with rejection in any context.

Far too much personal detail, time to stop

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